Monday, September 4, 2017

What I Learned On My Summer Vacation

It's Labor Day Weekend and the perfect time to reflect on what I learned from my summer vacation.

The truth is, like most parents, we invest a tremendous amount of time, money and emotional angst into creating idyllic summer memories that our children will cherish for the rest of their lives.

In the old days, our parents would fill scrapbooks with photos, post cards and school essays about what we did on our summer vacation. Today, our Facebook feeds and Instagram accounts will help "share these memories" in perpetuity.

Sunset in Captiva
From my childhood, I can recall visits to Colonial Williamsburg, Busch Gardens, Hershey Park, or nameless New Jersey lakes for picnics and swimming. I remember the hot, hot weather ... monstrous mosquito bites ... and overall fun and good feelings growing up with my sister and parents. My wife still recalls the long station wagon rides from Ohio to Florida with her family -- eating ham salad and pimento cheese sandwiches ... fighting with her brothers in the back of the car ... and visiting the neighborhood library in the yet-to-be developed Captiva Island. Fond memories and good feelings.

Summer Vacation Lessons

We all have those precious memories -- or scars -- burned in our minds. So, as a parent myself  who is trying to inflict -- oops, I mean share -- those special moments with my own three children, I have learned some valuable lessons from our summer vacations that I would like to share:

  • Eat What You Want. The staples to any diet on summer vacation are chicken fingers, pizza and ice cream.  They can be eaten any day -- and every day -- in any random order or combination for breakfast, lunch or dinner. I am not proud to say this, but my son Will survived our summer trips this year with a steady stream of chicken strips, french fries, Froot Loops and chocolate milk. No permanent damage.  Save the vegetables and yogurt for September. Meals are one fight not worth having on vacation.... which brings me to my next tip.

  • Tantrums and Pouting Happen. Everyone is out of their element and off their schedule a bit. Everyone gets tired being on the run from place to place, swimming and splashing all day, baking in the sun. It can be exhausting. People get cranky when they don't win a card game ... when someone else gets to choose the day's activity ... or when the wifi goes out (and that was just Dad!). We have three kids and as they've gotten older I try to accept that there may only be 45 seconds on a vacation when everyone of them is happy and smiling at the same time. Try to let it go and give everyone a little more tolerance -- at least that is what my wife told me about five times a day.

  • Keep It Simple -- On a more practical note, share the hotel safe combination with the kids, so that your youthful Bonnie and Clyde don't try to crack the safe for their iPads only to "break" it with multiple wrong combinations. Also, buy the international roaming day pass for the smart phones when you cruise outside the U.S. No matter how many times your daughter looks you in the eye and says she isn't using data, she is. And, the data overage texts from AT&T may ruin your day.

  • Focus On The Positive. I will always remember Will's smile when he got to embarrass me in a live "So You Think You Know Your Family" game show in front of 50 people (this was much better than the many grumpy faces when he had to put away his Nintendo DS). Or, I will remember Tess and Emma both being thrilled and laughing to see me get thrown off the banana boat (better than the multiple times they were fighting with the other).  Focus on those positive moments, not the fights, mistakes or frustrating ones (unless those stories become really funny over time). Re-tell those good stories to friends and family over and over, so they become the indelible recollections that are shared for years to come.

Find Your Own Mind's Highlight Reel

Summer vacations can be overwhelming if you're fortunate. There is so much pressure to make the most out of so little time.  You want to capture those big moments

But, in my mind (that place where I keep summer vacation memories from more than 30 years ago), the reality is I have added a few simple moments that will stand the test of time ... sharing a quiet sunset with my wife ... playing "silly" games  in the pool with Will ... watching Emma and Tess do their hysterical synchronized swimming routine in the Gulf of Mexico (The Circle of Life) ... or the girls laughing with each other at the Disney music trivia games. 

Years from now, when my kids are grown and summer vacations have changed, I hope that my tips have left me with a highlight reel of positive memories and emotions.

Let me know your tips and lessons for a great summer vacation and share your 2017 highlight reel. Enjoy!